Writers' challenge: write a negative film review

I linked to two reviews of Watchmen a few weeks ago. Ted Baehr's review got a bad rap from a lot of commenters.

But just this morning I spoke to one of my hip, culturally engaged, alternative Christian mates who went to see it. They were negative about the film because of it's distubing content.

Part of the reason for negative reactions to Ted's review, I suspect, is not the content but the style.
So here's my Writers' Challenge: choose a paragraph of Ted's review and rewrite it in a style the commenters would find less objectionable.