Generally it's right to leave a space of time between initial irritation/disappointment and response. Take the time to pray, to reflect, to caste your grumpiness upon the Lord.
I love that scene in The Apostle where Robert Duvall is going:
I'm angry at you, Lord. I love you, but I'm angry at you. I don't know if it's the devil or the Spirit. But I'm really angry, Lord.
and the mother is downstairs:
He does that sometimes. He's always talking to the Lord. Sometimes he yells at the Lord.
And after that, a brief, gentle, but firm word can carry just as much force as a big grumpy tantrum.
