I’ve had some conversations this week with young leaders figuring out how to set priorities, manage their work, own their priorities.
They have rightly heard that it’s important to say ‘No’. But I think they’ve got it wrong. They need to actually learn why it’s important to say ‘Yes’.
As a gross generalisation, I want young female leaders to say ‘No’ more and young male leaders to say ‘Yes’ more.
Why it is good to say No
It’s good to say No to give value to your Yes’s. It’s good to say No to things that are not priorities. It guards your priorities. It’s good to say No to people you are not as highly engaged with and committed to so you can fulfill your commitments to those you are in deep with.
And it’s good to say No when you honestly don’t have the resource. You can’t spend money you don’t have, for example. And the same goes with healthy, time and energy.
But that doesn’t means it’s always good to default to ‘No’. Or to say ‘I’ll think about. And then 5 days later say ‘No’‘.
Why it is bad to say No
I aim to be busy and fill up my time and stress myself. And at the same time I aim to be available. In that sense I don’t want people to think of me as ‘too busy’. As I grew up my Dad often said ‘If you want something done, ask a busy person’.
If something or someone is important to me I will do my best to say ‘Yes’ to them. I default to Yes for those things that contribute to my core priorities and for those people who are most important to me.
The great thing about this is that it fills up more and more of my time with the things that are most important and allows less and less time to those things that are not important.
Defaulting-to-No leaves you wide open to continue being ‘Too Busy For This New Task’
Defaulting-To-No slowly sends a message to those people who are important to you that you are too busy for them, and sends a message to the organisation you are a part of that you shouldn’t try to stretch to do more of what matters.
If you are given a new opportunity, presented with a big need, or invited to a great event, Default-To-Yes and then figure out how you can make it work.
via Blog - Christian Reflections http://genevapush.com/blogs/xian_reflections/why-you-should-not-default-to-saying-no (NB: to comment go to thegenevapush.com/xian_reflections)
